Okay, here are 200 ear-related puns for your blog, focused on realistic human situations:
1. I’m all ears for a good story.
2. Having trouble hearing? Ear today, gone tomorrow!
3. Don’t lend me your ear if you’re busy.
4. My listening skills are always on point. Ear-resistible, really.
5. I have a really bad cold, my ears are so stuffy.
6. I can’t make heads or tails of what you are saying, so I’m going to follow my ears.
7. Hearing aids: they’re sound investments.
8. I love a good ear massage.
9. Let’s keep this conversation on the up-and-up. Don’t want to be caught in the cross-ear.
10. Ear we go again!
11. Did you hear about the person who lost his ears? I haven’t.
12. I need a hearing test, it’s a pressing ear-gument.
13. My ears are ringing, must be someone talking about me.
14. This song is stuck in my head, an earworm!
15. I’m all ears if you want to talk about it.
16. I was all ears, until you started mumbling.
17. I have so many earings!
18. I think I am coming down with something, my ears are popping.
19. It doesn’t phase me, it goes in one ear and out the other.
20. My ears perked up when I heard about the sale!
21. I’m ear-itatingly good at remembering names.
22. Can you hear me now? Good.
23. I’m having an ear-ly mid-life crisis.
24. Listen closely, this is important. I ear-nestly mean it.
25. He was deaf to my pleas.
26. I was caught ear-ly this morning, but I made it in time for work.
27. I’m deafinitely going to the concert.
28. You haven’t seen my new necklace, here, lend me your ear.
29. My ears are on fire!
30. I’m getting an ear-ful from my boss.
31. I am not saying, but I heard through the grape vine…
32. I should go get a new pair of ear buds.
33. My dogs ears twitched when I started opening a bag of treats.
34. I don’t want to hear it!
35. I just had my ears pierced.
36. My ears always pop when I am on an airplane.
37. I got ear-marked for a new project.
38. I hope I didn’t bend your ear too much.
39. My ears are burning when I stepped outside today.
40. I gave him the old hairy eyeball and he was very uncomfortable.
41. That music is so loud, it is going to make my ears bleed.
42. Are you all right, you look a little deafeted.
43. Can you speak up, I can’t hear you in the back.
44. There are too many cooks in the kitchen, it is deafening.
45. Why won’t you listen to me?
46. Ear Muffins are my favorite winter accessory.
47. I only hear what I want to hear.
48. Are you hard of hearing?
49. Speak now or forever hold your peace.
50. I am all about hearing your side of the story.
51. Do you hear what I hear?
52. That song is so loud, it’s ear-splitting!
53. I am always paying attention, even if I am not all ears.
54. This noise is driving me up the wall!
55. My ears are playing tricks on me.
56. I have got to listen to my body, I am going to get some rest.
57. Can you hear me out?
58. My mom is deaf to my attempts to get a car.
59. Don’t give me any lip!
60. He turned a deaf ear.
61. You are not listening!
62. I was hoping for a little recognition, but I guess that fell on deaf ears.
63. I can not hear myself think.
64. Stop talking, I can’t ear myself think!
65. Did you hear what happened last night?
66. I can hear your voice!
67. Don’t you hear what I am saying?
68. Do I make myself clear?
69. I am really good at lending an ear.
70. Put a sock in it!
71. I can’t tell you, it is all very hush, hush.
72. Did you hear the silence?
73. Keep your ears to the ground and let me know what you hear.
74. He is all talk.
75. I am not deaf, you just aren’t saying anything that I want to hear.
76. Why don’t you ever listen to my advice?
77. You are being so dense, can’t you hear me?
78. The sound of the ocean is ear-ie.
79. He has selective hearing.
80. My mom loves to tell me she didn’t raise me to be deaf.
81. Don’t get your ears lowered, go on and apply!
82. I am all ears, but all I hear is garbage.
83. I could really use a back massage and an ear scratch.
84. He can’t hear, so he reads lips.
85. I can’t find my ear buds.
86. I am too young to have hearing problems.
87. I am trying to get a hold of my hearing.
88. It is hard to hear underwater.
89. I have tunnel ear.
90. I would love to hear more about what you have to say.
91. I heard you the first time!
92. I didn’t hear you come in!
93. I had to turn the volume up, I couldn’t ear you.
94. I lost hearing in my left ear because I couldn’t hear on the right!
95. He went in one ear and out the other.
96. The ringing in my ears is deafening.
97. He speaks with authority and ear-nestness.
98. I think my ears have been blessed.
99. I can’t hear well, I need glasses.
100. The noise is overwhelming, I am going ear-serk!
101. I think I need to get my ears cleaned at the ear wash.
102. Get the ear out of here.
103. You’ve got another thing coming if you think I am all ears.
104. Hearing is believing.
105. What you don’t know won’t ear you.
106. You will do it, hear-by!
107. I am sorry, I am not hearing anything you have to say.
108. The loud music really hurts my ears.
109. I lost an ear bud in my ear canal.
110. My hearing is too selective, I am going to be deaf.
111. You are talking too much, you are going to bend my ear.
112. I have an ear for music.
113. This is hard to listen to, it is really grating on my ears.
114. I have a lot on my plate, I can’t be all ears today.
115. He had to get tubes in his ears when he was a child.
116. I’ve got rabbit ears, I can hear everything!
117. This is making my ears numb.
118. Don’t get an earful.
119. I have an earful for you.
120. My ears were deceived.
121. My ears are throbbing.
122. I want new ears for christmas.
123. The baby has an ear infection.
124. She is deaf and proud.
125. I was born with a hearing disability.
126. He has a cochlear implant, he is learning to hear again.
127. I hate having water trapped in my ears.
128. That concert was an ear-xperience!
129. I had to get my ear candled.
130. I am all ears when it comes to gossip.
131. Earmark your spot in line.
132. Don’t earmuff your problems, deal with them head on.
133. I am ear-ning my keep.
134. Hear hear!
135. I hear tell you are not supposed to put q-tips in your ear.
136. We will have to play it by ear.
137. Lend me your ear.
138. Let me bend your ear.
139. I am all ears!
140. I hope I didn’t bend your ear too much about my problems.
141. Come here, let me whisper in your ear.
142. My voice is horse, I can barely ear myself think!
143. They are deaf, but they don’t sign.
144. I don’t hear you very well with that mask on.
145. My ears are ringing from the show last night.
146. She won’t listen to me because I am younger.
147. He refused to listen to my advice.
148. My ears are clogged.
149. Wax buildup is blocking my hearing.
150. A hear, a hear, for the queen!
151. I am losing my hearing with age.
152. I can’t hear well, I might be old.
153. It is hard to ear when your mouth is full.
154. I’m an ear-responsible person.
155. I’m ear-resistible to bad ideas.
156. I’m ear-ritated by slow walkers.
157. Let’s keep this on the ear-ficial.
158. Don’t be so ear-rogant.
159. I’m feeling very ear-ratic today.
160. She has that ear-idescent glow.
161. Time to ear-ase some bad memories.
162. He’s got a real ear-nest personality.
163. It’s an ear-regular situation.
164. I’m having an ear-thly experience.
165. Don’t be so ear-ly to judge.
166. That was an ear-ful performance.
167. I’m trying to be ear-ficient.
168. Let’s be ear-nestly honest.
169. I’m a very ear-ly riser.
170. I’m having an ear-ternal struggle.
171. Let’s make this ear-sy.
172. I’m feeling ear-rie today.
173. This situation is ear-tremely complicated.
174. Don’t be so ear-dictable.
175. I’m an ear-nest student of life.
176. It’s an ear-real situation.
177. Let’s be ear-sons for a change.
178. I’m feeling a little ear-itable.
179. It’s an ear-normous problem.
180. Don’t be so ear-logical.
181. I’m having an ear-ventful day.
182. Let’s be ear-sponsible and stay home.
183. This is an ear-ceptional opportunity.
184. I’m a very ear-spressive person.
185. It’s an ear-dinary day.
186. Don’t be so ear-centric.
187. I’m feeling ear-static.
188. Let’s be ear-ternal friends.
189. This is an ear-lusive deal.
190. I’m a very ear-laborate person.
191. It’s an ear-ucational experience.
192. Don’t be so ear-clusive.
193. I’m feeling ear-lated.
194. I could ear a horse.
195. I’d give my right ear for that.
196. I think someone is bugging my ears.
197. I gave him the ear.
198. Do you read me ear?
199. You are just blowing smoke in my ear.
200. A dog is a good listener, they always have a pair of ears available.